Find out who you are

I look at this picture and I want to be her every day.  A few years ago my son and his friend made this picture of me on the driveway.  The image was washed away with the closest rain shower, but I could not let this amazing expression of who I am get lost forever so I took a picture.  Later, I realized this image can’t be washed away because beneath the surface, this is really who I am.  I am “her” every day.

So how do I know this?  Well, it took a lot of soul searching, coaching training and time, but mostly, it took awareness, acceptance and commitment to find this kind of peace of mind.

So here is one way to go…

1)    Awareness – Awareness is key component to the question of “Who am I?”.  We live in a world that loves to compare, measure and decide who we are every day.  We are often so busy that we seldom feel we have a minute to take a break let alone take time to think about “who we are.” By taking a look at our lives, as we are living them now, it is an opportunity to identify what we do, reflect on the things we like and embrace the things we are really great at.  Once we can see our strengths and recognize what inspires us, we can discard the things in our lives that don’t fit and get started on creating a new design for the way we want to live.  Awareness can be a grounding force in helping us to articulate who we are and how we choose to live.

2)    Acceptance – Self- acceptance can be like a breath of fresh air.  For some reason, it is something that is very hard for people to allow themselves.  Right or wrong, good or bad, success or failure, are all labels that we put on ourselves.  I have to ask, “Why do we do this? How does this help us?” Consider this, we have made choices and decisions in the past because, at the time, those choices made sense.   We are human beings.  If we can accept our “humanness” we have an opportunity to learn from our choices and move forward.  By dropping the judgment and embracing self-acceptance, we can feel peace of mind about who we are.

3)    Commitment – Commitment to self is as commendable as commitment to others. Sometimes we are so busy with our jobs and helping other people that this can be incredibly challenging.  We know the needs of others sometimes better than we know our own.  Making a commitment to our wellbeing shows determination and supports us to make confident, positive and healthy choices. It opens up to understand more about “who we are” but also gives us the energy to more effectively help other people.

So get out there and start to look for your picture.  It doesn’t have to be in a chalk drawing on a sidewalk.  You might very well find it in the eyes of the people who love you or beneath the surface as a feeling in your heart.  I hope you find your answer very soon!

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About Elaine Totten Davis

I am a life and career coach partnering primarily with creative professionals and individuals in transition who want to create their a vision for what they want their lives to be whether in the professional lives or their personal lives.
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